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What do you see as the internal and external influences that may affect the balance of a relationship? Introduction“Stable object relations result in our ability to form stable relationships, to trust others, and to persist with positive relationships during times of conflict” (Hutchison 2003, p. 188). Persons in intimate relationship tend to act in response to their relationships sensitively and these widespread positive or negative affects can shape how a person recognizes and subsequently reports his or her partner’s communicative behaviour. The balance in a relationship is essential to preserve the physical, emotional, and energetic harmony between people and therefore any shift in the balance of the relationship has substantial depressing consequences.

Our research will focus on the factors that affect the balance of relationship, the relationship between a married couple, and actions that should be taken to reinstate this balance. Balance of Relationship“A relationship is the complete synchronization between two people where a true bond forms and deep intimacy can be experienced” (Nathan 2005, p. 3). It is a physical, emotional, and energetic harmony between people that go beyond distance. All we put into a relationship harmony either supports, develops, builds, fortified, or, on the contrary, weakens it with tension and distress (Nathan 2005, p. 4).

According to Broome and Llewelyn (1995), the shift in the balance of the relationship between partners may also have harsh repercussions on the sexual relationship. For instance, a male partner may shift from wage earner and partner to that of another child to be cared for (p. 397). A couple may also go through sexual issues such as sexual dysfunction, contraception, infertility, sterilization, affairs, STDs, and HIV/AIDS (Harvey et. al. 2004, p. 589). The circumstances under which one feels dedicated to a specific relationship is reliant on the degree to which one finds personal and relationship growth, perceived self-concept support, and mutual perceived understanding in light of available alternative relationships (Cahn 1987, p.

3 taken from Thibaut and Kelley (1959)). Relationships last when an overall balance is maintained and they end when one or both partners sense the relationship has gotten out of balance and does not have the capacity to come again. This can be due to an imbalance of taking and giving, an imbalance in basic life force, in spiritual evolution, money, sex, power, housework, childcare, communication, or any other elements that play out in the arena of relationship (Anodea 1999, p. 204).

The Case of Husband and Wife BA couple whose marital difficulties came when the wife began to feel positive changes in her self-concept when she realized that the gratifications that came from being more independent far outweighed the more child-like gratifications that stemmed from her financial dependence on her husband. Wife B and husband B had been married for 10 years.

They had a girl aged 6 and a boy aged 8. Wife B recently got her degree in law and her husband is maintenance supervisor in a local firm. Since wife B began to start working in a reputable law firm, she began to feel and act in a more self-confident, capable and assertive way. Their marriage began to become increasingly complicated as husband B had become very critical of wife B predominantly in her role of homemaker and mother. Husband B also started spending longer hours at work than he had in the past, and would often come home after their children were in bed.

Husband B’s self-concept and sense of gender identity was closely tied up with his image of his wife. His masculine identity was partially dependent on his own characteristics, but was also dependent of wife’s characteristics and the nature of the relationship as well.

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